Friday, December 23, 2011

I'm so Bored that I baked cookies

It's CHRISTMAS EVE!

Do you know what that means?

Jesus, you say? Yes, Him too ... but mostly, COOKIES!***

Today (Actually yesterday, technically, but I haven't been to sleep yet) I have made:

Snickerdoodles

Sour cream cookies

Sugar cookies (which I made the dough for yesterday [or two days ago, really ... you know what I mean!])

AND

Ginger bread cookie dough (although it might taste a little odd, seeing as we didn't have enough molasses, so I substituted some golden syrup and some dark corn syrup for over half of the molasses [which will probably taste doubly weird, because the dark corn syrup was supposed to be dark cane syrup...])

So far, all of these taste scrumptious! (I haven't tasted the ginger bread, and frankly I don't intend to do so, since ginger is NASTY!)

However, yesterday (by which I mean Thursday), I had adventures in Bakeland, because I used the wrong snickerdoodle recipe.

For those of you who don't know, snickerdoodles are a favorite Christmas treat in Boredom. They are made by rolling a scrumptious (I like that word!) dough into balls, which are then rolled in a cinnamon sugar mixture.

SNICKERDOODLES...YUMMMMMY
Sometimes, I like to also put colored sugar on them, to make them Christmas-y and festive.

Anyway, there is a book with an awesome snickerdoodle recipe in it. If you use this recipe, you get delicious snickerdoodles. If you use this book and roll some of the cookies in cinnamon sugar and then roll one in just sugar, my mom will ask you, "Is that the albino snickerdoodle?" We used this book today (yesterday).

This is the RIGHT book for Snickerdoodles
However, there is some old cookies and sweets cookbook in my kitchen (I'm not going to check the name of the book right now) which has a thoroughly bizarre recipe for "snickerdoodles." This recipe has way too high a ratio of liquids to solids, such as flour.  It also uses MILK. Hint #1: If the recipe calls for milk, it is not a snickerdoodle recipe...

So, yesterday (Thursday), my little brothers and I mixed up this "snickerdoodle recipe," and it came out looking like a cross between thick cake batter and frosting. I wish I'd gotten a picture of it. Anyway, I resisted the urge to pour it into a cake pan and bake it into a snickerdoodle cake. (By the way, snickerdoodle cake is real and delicious - check out the recipe in the Cake Mix Doctor [But if you're following my blog, you already know this...])

Instead, I mixed in more flour and a little more sugar. The resulting dough was rather sticky, but was at least manageable as dough. I rolled it into balls, which I then rolled in cinnamon sugar and colored sugar (still believing that I was making snickerdoodles), and baked.

The result was a cookie which looked like a snickerdoodle. It smelled like a snickerdoodle. It felt like a snickerdoodle. I suppose it even sounded like a snickerdoodle.

This imposter cookie, however, did not taste like a snickerdoodle.

As such, we have dubbed the cookies Katiedoodles*. They were really quite good, although they were not what we were expecting to bake.

Unfortunately, they are now an endangered species of cookie. There is only one left, and it is wrapped up and hidden, awaiting a visit from my Lovaaah.

If you would like to try one, however, I could always attempt to recreate them.

So, the moral of the story is: The best things in life, be they Messiahs or cookies, often appear in rather unexpected ways.

Merry Christmas, everyone!

*The name Katiedoodle is not meant to refer to a cookie that contains Katie, as Katie is alive and well. It is merely meant to reflect Katie's** ownership of the recipe, as opposed to Snicker's ownership of his recipe. 


**The name Katie is not meant to refer to me as if it were my actual name, but is used only because Katiedoodle seems a far more delightful name for a cookie than  Boreddoodle. I am Bored, and any connection to the name Katie is purely coincidental. 


***Actually, mostly Jesus, in case you were confused.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

I'm so Bored that I stole Fisheater's pet rock

Hi, my faithful followers!

(By that, of course, I mean the empty void of cyberspace...I'm talking to myself - how Bored am I?)

I finished exams, passed all but one of them (organic chemistry is a monster, but I shall beat it next semester), and now I am at home, surrounded by siblings, stockings, decorations, and a giant hole. I'm about to be surrounded by cookie dough, as soon as I finish this post.

Since none of that is interesting, I'm going to tell you about my last day at school this semester. This story, like most of the good ones, features Fisheater and the rest of his clan.

The week had been pretty crazy. Most of my classes finished before exam week, and my two remaining exams weren't til Friday and Saturday, so I had a lot of free time. I spent most of it in Mayf 15, except for a long stretch of time that I spent in a physics lab...

The last day arrived, Saturday. Due to the craziness of my friends, the relentless presence of Boredom, and Fisheater repeatedly whispering "You're going to FAIL!" the only sleep I had acquired in the past 72 hours consisted of an afternoon nap and a few hours Thursday night. Needless to say, I needed sleep.

I went home to my dorm and crashed, but my sleep was constantly interrupted. My dad called, saying he was on the way to pick me up for Christmas break. Incoherently, I yelled something like, "It won't work! Nothing will work! I can't go!" and then hung up the phone.

When I awoke about an hour later, I realized that I had yelled at my dad and possibly hung up on him, so I called him back to apologize. He said he and my sister would get to the dorm while I was in my orgo exam.

Delighted with the idea of not packing by myself, I cleaned my room, took a shower, and headed out to find lunch before my orgo exam. The exam started at 3. I left my dorm at about 2:20. Totally had time for lunch!

Here's an interesting thing about my school. They close all the dining halls DURING exam week. Not after exam week, DURING! This means that if you are unlucky enough to have an exam on Saturday (i.e. if you are a science major or pre-med) than you do not get to eat anything except munchie mart food. Munchie marts are like convenience stores - they sell chips, pretzels, Vitamin water, and random assortments of candy and unidentifiable frozen entrees.

I had forgotten that my school hates me, so I tried to go to Rand - closed. Ok, I'll try upstairs at the Pub - also closed. Fine, I'll go downstairs to the coffee shop - CLOSED. At this point, it was about 2:35, so I was pretty desperate. Dear administration, ALL I WANT IS FOOD! Anyway, I decided to try Rotiki, a pizza place. So, I drove over there, only to find it closed, of course. Luckily, the munchie mart attached to it was still open, so I bought a package of pretzels, some Coke (I was in dire need of caffeine), and some frozen lasagna.

What I thought was a 4 minute cook time actually turned out to be an 8 minute cook time. (The package said cook for 4 minutes, then cook for another 4 minutes...) So, I cooked it for 6 minutes, but then it was burning hot, and I only had 15 minutes to get across campus for my exam.

So, I ate hot lasagna WHILE I drove to class. Driving with your left hand while you eat lasagna with your right hand and then proceed to hyperventilate because the lasagna is way too hot to eat is totally normal, right? Good.

Anyway, I made it to the exam, went inside, sat down, and looked at my exam. I knew just about none of the answers.

I prayed. I still didn't know the answers.

So, I started guessing randomly.

After about an hour, I realized that I was guessing randomly about complex reaction mechanisms. I was never going to pass this exam. I was already signed up to take the class again next semester, and nothing was going to change that.

So, why exactly was I sitting there?

I drew a Santa hat on the Benzene structure on the last page.

You told me to transform the benzene, so I did. Merry Christmas!
Then, I left. I went back to my dorm and found my dad and sister...not there. I called my dad, and he said, "We're at the mall. Be there soon."

Basically, I knew that I had plenty of time to kill.

So, I murdered it. 
Actually, I packed. Then, I found a website for small children with coloring pages.

Yeah, I'm 5...
Then, Samma told me she was making crescent rolls...YUM! So, I went back over to 15.

The following convo ensued:

Samma: "Hey, Fisheater left his room unlocked!"

Me: "Oh, we should make sure he has his key, then lock it."

Samma (from inside the room): "Oh, you're a much better person than me. I was just going to steal stuff."

So, we did.

Fisheater should take better care of his rock...
Apparently, the rock's name is Sal. She is having lots of fun in Boredom.